Ill Met By Moonlight — New Headcanon:

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New Headcanon:

Mila’s from a huge working-class family of fifteen brothers and sisters and they’re all gardeners and tailors and housekeepers and stuff. Garak’s got a million aunts and uncles and cousins and he’s very close to them because Mila and Tain would send him to stay with them all the time when they were off on OO business.


After the war they were all super glad to see him return to Cardassia and were like “glad you’re back, cousin, wasn’t it harsh of your mom’s boss to exile you like that? Ruling classes, am I right? Anyway, do you need a job? Uncle Rusty’s getting on and could use a little help in the tailor shop.”

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When they find out he’s dating Julian, they’re just amused, like, “A human? Typical Elim. Him and his notions, since Mila let her boss send him to that fancy school.” 

“Ma, cousin Elim says can he bring his boyfriend to Solstice Dinner?”

“Is he dating again? Finally. Yeah, of course he can, what a question.”

“He says he’s asking because his boyfriend’s human.”

“Yeah? Well, as long as Uncle Dipsy doesn’t have too much kanar and say something stupid about Setlik III it’ll be fine. Hope the human likes tojal, because Grandma’s bringing heaps of it.”

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Then, at Solstice Dinner, when they find out Julian’s a doctor, they’re more amused by that than they are by his species. “Another doctor, Elim?” says Cousin Olna into her glass of kanar. “You really have a type, don’t you?”

Garak tries to shush Olna, because actually he’s dated two other doctors (Julian knows about Parmak but not about that other regrettable choice Garak was with for a hot minute). He’s hopeful Julian didn’t catch what Olna said, because at the time he was talking to Auntie Melva about tennis seeding or something (Melva was quite the athlete in her youth), and anyway Olna said it in service dialect. But of course Julian can tell something’s up, and when he innocently inquires, Olna and the rest of the cousins are very happy to fill him in, without much exaggeration. 

Garak refills his kanar and reminds himself how much he missed his family when he was in exile. 

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Garak’s cousin’s got a three-year-old and Julian’s glad the kid’s grasp of Kardasi is about as good as his. He and the kid often misunderstand the same things. “When do we get to the wizard’s house?” asks the tot from her seat in the Garak family skimmer, one day when the cousins are taking Julian and Garak for a spin in the mountains (they often insist on this, especially around holidays). 

The adult Cardassians laugh fondly, and explain that they aren’t going to a wizard’s house. It’s a town that sounds a little like a Kardasi word for wizard. Julian was about to ask the same thing and he’s very glad he waited to open his mouth. (He knows the word from the books Garak has given him. Not that he believed it would be an actual wizard, but maybe some Cardassian mystic or something.) 

He and the child share a disappointed glance. 

cardassians not my headcanon BUT I LOVE IT

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