interspecies dating plot bunny
Garak has been Cardassian-flirting as hard as he can at Julian, and is baffled as to why Julian responds very well right up until it seems like they might tip over into an actual relationship and then… stops.
See, interspecies relationships are so common in the Federation that there’s the unspoken understanding about them: You need to make an effort to flirt in your potential partner’s cultural style to signal that you understand that there will be differences and that you accept that. Flirting exclusively in your own culture’s style is a tactful way of saying, “I enjoy the flirting, but I don’t want this to actually go anywhere.” So Julian thinks Garak doesn’t really want to have a relationship, he’s just entertaining himself.
Meanwhile, Cardassians virtually never date outside their species. (They did not “date” Bajorans. That was something else.) It just doesn’t occur to Garak that not doing some human flirting might be sending a message.
