[joshnewberry]

people who complain about dinosaurs “not being scary anymore” because its been discovered they have feathers and are closely related to/ancestors of birds are so bizarre like

• its not about how scary they are, they are/were real life animals and what matters is learning more about them, not how well they fit into your science fiction horror film lol
  
• can you imagine a 13 foot chicken running at you with full intent to eat you??? thats fucking terrifying holy shit
  

[roachpatrol]

peacocks are synonymous with vain, frivolous beauty and they will attack cars. they will attack you while you try to get to your car. they’re like six feet of useless feathers and they will destroy you. imagine if they were carnivorous and had functional spurs. 

a t-rex could look like a gay disco ball and i guarantee that you would fucking book it if it had a problem with you

[thepioden]

listen

listen

have you ever met a swan

if anything the birdier they get the scarier they are

[everybodyilovedies]

Australia literally fought a war against giant birds AND FUCKING LOST

[hyena-butts]

@kidwithheadphones

[keepyourhandsbusy]

Overheard in the student lounge:

“Oh man, I can’t deal with birds ‘cause they’re dinosaurs and sometimes it’s like they get this glint in their eyes and they remember.”

“Have you ever interacted with a goose? ‘Cause those things are dicks.”

[niamhermind]

If chickens were still the size of a T-Rex we’d all be dead. No question.

[camwyn]

Feathered creatures that give some serious lie to the idea that feathered dinosaurs ain’t scary:

This is a bearded vulture, or lammergeier. It’s four feet long and has a nine foot wingspan and it eats bones.

This is a shoebill stork. It dropped the duck without biting down shortly after the picture was taken, but if it had decided not to-

… it could have been the end of the road for that duck.

This is the last thing a fish sees before a macaroni penguin eats it.

This is a secretary bird in the act of demonstrating to Lord Voldemort that he came to the wrong neighborhood, ese.

This is a goose.

This is a vulture.

This is a cassowary on the attack. 

Be glad I couldn’t find the actual gif of a pelican swallowing a fish, because it’s freakin’ Lovecraftian in its HEADS SHOULD NOT BEND THAT WAY factor. You’ll have to settle for the idea of a feathered dinosaur suddenly going GLORP and devouring its victims whole just like this lady here.

Steven Spielberg didn’t create these. These are the feet of an emu.

And this is what happens when a swan (this one is named Asboy; his father was Mr. Asbo, the first swan in the UK to get named after an anti-social behavior order in ‘honor’ of his tendency to attack boaters) decides it doesn’t like you. I should probably note that this one attacked a cow.

Respect the feathered dinosaur, yo.

[dduane]

Terrifying. The last two illustrate why you did not fuck around with the Children of Lir.

[la-vallett1]

I suspected that a dinosaur could have been feathered after I heard that a T-Rex is the chickens’ ancestor.

[dezzoi]

For those who think dinos aren’t cool because they’re feathered…whatever, mutherfuckers.  Evolution doesn’t give two shits what you think is cool or not.

[varanusindicus]

You showed a cassowary on the attack, but forgot to show what exactly it’s attacking with. Their feet are nearly identical to the Emu’s, except for one minor, teeny tiny detail: A five-inch claw for killing motherfuckers, raptor-style.

[bonesofthepast]

This is like the “fuck birds master post” and I love it because
Honestly,
Fuck. Birds.

[kedreeva]

Do you know how many people are scared of chickens? After I started owning chickens, I found out: it’s a LOT. It’s a LOT of people. I joined chicken Facebook groups for when I get roosters or hens dumped that I need to re-home, and found out: it’s even MORE. And it’s a fucking chicken. We’ve domesticated them to the point that most of them want to be our friends when we’re nice to them. We are at the top of their food chain. The worst damage a chicken can do is like, scratch you, or peck you, before you grab it with the hands you evolved for doing things like grabbing chickens. Even the roosters, who can have considerable spurs, almost certainly aren’t going to kill you, not unless they were to, like, get a freakishly accurate and lucky hit to you carotid or something. And yet. There remains a huge portion of people who are afraid of chickens. There are so many people who will run if a rooster comes at them.

The velociraptor was about 2 feet tall. That’s about the size of a turkey. Do you know how many people are scared of turkeys? Do you know how many people will run away from a turkey coming at them? Almost everyone. It’s about the size of a goose; and even more people will run from a goose. And none of them have proper bone anchored teeth, or sickle claws, or grasping hands. They’re not predators, they eat grass and bugs and maybe small rodents or fish if they catch them but it’s not a staple. And yet. So many people are terrified of them. The feathers don’t seem to be a problem for their fear.

So anyone who says that they would look at a 10-14 TON dinosaur with sharp teeth and decide “that’s not scary because it has feathers” is lying to you. Because the people who know better than to be scared of a turkey, know enough to fear a Trex or velociraptor.