hey do you ever just think about how when garak tried to blow up the founders’ homeworld, not only was he trying to save the alpha quadrant, but more likely than not, he was also trying to carry out tain’s last wishes
at that point, he was under the impression that tain was dead. we know from tain’s actual death that he wanted garak to survive and take revenge on the dominion for how they slighted him. this came as no surprise to garak, and it’s fair to assume garak would implicitly know that if he wasn’t present for his father’s shri-tal, this is what he should do to avenge his father like a good son would. giving everything - his own life included - to gain an ounce of hollow redemption in the eyes of the man who would never even acknowledge his own son.
and do you also think about how it would have killed julian, that garak would have done it for the greater good, and for tain, but at least the pain wouldn’t last long because they’d all die soon after. that he couldn’t live with that guilt, that emptiness that he destroyed the one thing that deserved so much more than him, deserved life and love and everything garak couldn’t possibly give him. destroying the beacon of hope in his dark world. it would be a relief when he died for his crime, because he deserved it and at least he wouldn’t have to face his shame.
do you think about how it all played out. that garak wasn’t allowed to follow through, and in this was given a second chance. tain or julian, not both. past or future. hurt or healing. the old ways or a new beginning, for cardassia, for the alpha quadrant, for himself. it brought them there, to camp 371, where once again, it was julian and tain, julian or tain. the death witnessed by the survivor, the chosen witness, a choice, another chance. fealty or freedom. the idea of cardassia or cardassia itself, true salvation in a willingness to hope and grow over blind bitter strangulating loyalty to a dying delusion, a bloated corpse of what was and what should never be again. julian as a new chance at life, building a garden from the dust and rubble, and garak making his choice, grateful for second chances. even alone and cold in the ruins of his home, still glad he made that choice.
No, I think Garak is just a vengeful bitch.
