Oh my fucking gooooooddddd shut the fuck upppppppppppp you melting patchouli scented wax figure. This motherfucker looks like you can smell him coming ala Henry VIII, dresses entirely in piles of clothes that would get turned away from a Goodwill dumpster, and had to have the arduously complex lines in Pirates of the Caribbean 73 and Harry Potter Spin Off 4 read to him through an earpiece because he was too high/drunk to get through filming, but he thinks cancel culture is the reason he’s unemployable?
People “persecuting” him for his personal life doesn’t have shit to do with why he’s not getting work. No one actually cares that he abused Amber Heard. Josh Brolin beat Diane Lane and Robert Downey Jr spent most of the 90s and early 2000s high as a goddamned kite and they were still in the highest earning movie franchise of all time. Sean Penn abused and raped Madonna, and gets invited to speak at the UN. Roman Polanski is literally a convicted pedophile and he still churns out a new critically beloved movie practically every year. No one in the entertainment industry actually gives a shit about accusations of abuse. The collapse of the TimesUp board last month proves it.
The reason Johnny Depp isn’t getting booked is because he loses studios money and brings a lot of bad press. Period. If he stopped suing his ex wife and losing, or getting taken to the cleaners by the fucking Sun of all papers, or showed up sober and knowing his lines, he’d still be making movies. Famous men get away with this shit all the time, and the only time people do anything about it is when the risk outweighs the financial benefit. That’s how Weinstein got away with it for decades, it’s why Mel Gibson is working again, and if he’d just shut the fuck up and take a shower occasionally, it’d be how Johnny Depp could ‘escape cancel culture’ or whatever.
But go ahead with this little victim storyline, buddy. That’ll definitely get you a role in Tim Burton’s dark Hot Topic remake of Green Acres or whatever the fuck he’s up to.
Honestly, men are so fucking tiresome.
