I think the funniest story I have of Lowe's is when I was doing returns. I can't remember what this contractor was returning but it was either awkward or heavy (or both) so I was helping him get it off or out of his cart. He's got his phone pinned between his face and his shoulder and he's arguing with someone, either another contractor or the person he's contracted to, something about windows, so he's fairly distracted, right?
Our hands wound up brushing and all of a sudden I've got his undivided attention and he just blurts out, "oh fuck your hands are soft!" And then looks like he wishes he could shove those words right back into his mouth, and before I can even scramble to come up with a response, his face twisted into like a very deadpan mocking face and he said, "does it SOUND like I'm talking to you? Are we within hands touching distance? Oh God I hope so, so you can feel how soft THESE hands aren't."
